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Scott Adams quotes

'Dilbert' became popular during the downsizing of the '90s, and job security was a major theme of the strip.

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.

Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers. It's great work if you can get it.

Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.

My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.

I try to manage my day by my circadian rhythms because the creativity is such an elusive thing, and I could easily just stomp over it doing my administrative stuff.

The best plan now is to have as many bosses as possible. I call it boss diversity. If you work for a company and you have one boss and that boss doesn't like you or wants to get rid of you, you're in trouble. But if you work for yourself, you have lots of bosses, who are your customers, and if a few of them decide they don't like you, that's okay.

For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

The best things in life are silly.

In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks.

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company.

You don't argue with a four-year old about why he shouldn't eat candy for dinner. You don't punch a mentally handicapped guy even if he punches you first. And you don't argue when a women tells you she's only making 80 cents to your dollar. It's the path of least resistance. You save your energy for more important battles.

Home is pretty utopian.

I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.

The computer cuts my production time in half. I love it.

In fact, most people are being squeezed in their little cubicle, and their creativity is forced out elsewhere, because the company can't use it. The company is organized to get rid of variants.

The greenest home is the one you don't build. If you really want to save the Earth, move in with another family and share a house that's already built. Better yet, live in the forest and eat whatever the squirrels don't want.