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Samantha Bee quotes

I don't think the show would be funny to you if you didn't already have a base of information.

I hate birthdays. I thought that I only hated my own birthday, and then I realized that I hate my children's birthdays too.

Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people.

The best part about poker is there's no down side.

Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.

A lot of funny stuff happens in Canada.

I am a cookbook fanatic.

I continue to be very shy. I think a lot of actors and performers are really weird, shy people working it out onstage. I don't know why that is.

I get maximum satisfaction out of buying children's clothes online.

I learn something in the interviews from time to time.

I think NASCAR's coming to Canada now so it'll take on a whole new relevance. Be afraid.

I think the show does better with newsmakers and politicians than it does with actors.

I was totally unknown in the television and film industry in Canada.

I'm capable of living in the moment. And I'm especially capable of living in the moment of sitting on my sofa and watching other people's moments.

If it wasn't for what goes on in the world of politics, we wouldn't really have much of a show.

It is so expensive to take care of my hair and keep it looking like I was born with it, when my real hair is the color of rat fur.

It was only a few years ago that I couldn't get hired to save my life.

It's great when you have people who will speak passionately and honestly about what they are doing.

It's not every day people fly you to New York for auditions.

There are some people who believe that these are not real stories with real people, but they actually are.