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Will Rogers quotes

The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'

A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.

If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

A fool and his money are soon elected.

We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.

Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?

Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.